The Institute

Tag: Food

Go to L.A., drive down to Pico and Glendon, eat at The Apple Pan.

Twilight

Is there any other kind?

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NOT AT ALL SURPRISED

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Don’t get me wrong, I’m all about ‘the science’, but, who in the hell really needed some egghead in a white coat telling them that vegetarians were unhealthy and mentally disturbed? I mean, come on people, put two and two together for Christ’s sake!

Think of it this way, Hitler was a vegetarian. Hitler was bad. And, you know who is like Hitler? Trump. Therefore, vegetarianism is bad. Go eat some meat, you’ll be glad you did.

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PREPARATION OF SALAD FOR ‘THE NIGHT SHIFT’

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“The Night Shift?” you ask curious to know what kind of hi-jinx The President and Founder is up to now while also silently appreciative of the fact that he is taking care of himself by ‘eating healthy’. “Yes, The Night Shift”, I (The President and Founder) reply touching you gently on your shoulder while staring for too long into your eyes.

You do know ‘The Night Shift’, don’t you? No? What the fuck is wrong with you? Don’t answer that, I’m not interested. Here instead is a brief summation of the show as found on (the) Google:

A night-shift doctor at San Antonio Memorial, T.C. Callahan struggles to find the balance between saving lives and the hard reality of running a hospital. Joining him as he faces the sometimes dangerous task of running the emergency room are his best friend — who often shoulders the unenviable job of keeping T.C. out of trouble — Topher; former Army medic, Drew; lead physician — and T.C.’s ex-girlfriend — Jordan; and surgical resident, Paul. The rigors of the job may expose some personal weaknesses, but their shared drive to save their patients bonds them together in a tight-knit group.

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or, as NBC suggests:

Follow the crazy cases of San Antonio Memorial’s heroic staff on The Night Shift

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to which I would add:

While enjoying a healthy repast

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BOWL OF TOAST

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I GOT A “KICK ASS” BURRITO HERE

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Normally I would never dream of using profanity in one of my posts. I just don’t think it’s cool. However, in this particular case, due to the unbelievable awesomeness of the burrito purchased at this establishment I have made an exception.

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The ‘carne asada’ burrito available at this place would turn a vegan carnivore, therefore, I am going to keep its location secret out of respect for certain people’s life choices.

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WHEN I COUNT TO TEN AND SNAP MY FINGERS YOU WILL AWAKE REFRESHED AND BELIEVE, WITHOUT A DOUBT, THAT VEGAN CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES AREN’T JUST FOR SISSIES

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I admit, just up until a couple of days ago, if some guy told me he liked vegan chocolate chip cookies I’d have been thoroughly disgusted with him and even wondered (were certain circumstances to arise) if he (the self confessed vegan cookie lover, that is) would be worth killing. Now, (thanks to the intervention of come kind and compassionate individuals) I have come to my senses and would never, ever, allow myself to have such thoughts. Oh, no, I’m not like that anymore. I swear.

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Vegan chocolate chip cookies prepared by The President and Founder for a person we will call ‘The Best Ever’

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I CALL THIS ONE ‘HIDING FROM THE JEHOVAH’S WITNESSES’

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This work was inspired by an actual event.

Earlier today, while minding my own business, I heard the unmistakable sound of a car coming up the gravel drive. Not ever expecting any visitors I popped up from my most comfortable seat upon the famed purple couch and immediately spotted what I could see were two of Jehovah’s witnesses* in a late model Toyota intent on disrupting the solitude of my Saturday. Needless to say, without a moment to lose, I dashed out of the front room, through the kitchen (where only the night before I baked nearly 2 dozen of the most scrumptious vegan chocolate chip cookies), around the corner, up the stairs (without holding the hand rail), and into the room (sadly now all but empty) of my assistant who some time ago fled to the other side of the continent. What you see above is a representation of what I looked at for the several terrifying minutes those Witnesses spent pounding upon my front door.

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*Some will ask, “But, how did you know they were Jehovah’s Witnesses?”, to which I would answer, “Oh, you can tell, believe me, you can just tell”.

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Accidents are not accidents but precise arrivals at the wrong right time*

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*Dejan Stojanovic

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