TWAS UNDER THE PROTECTIVE CANOPY OF A MAJESTIC CEDAR WHERE I DID HIDE FROM MY OPPRESSOR

by The Institute for the Study of Slightly Varying Circumstances

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As you can see in the photo below there was a helicopter in the sky that ‘just happened to be flying around’ when I, due to my having what is generally referred to as a ‘severe hankering’, set out for a nearby convenience mart for to purchase a bag of ‘Flamin’ Hot Cheetos’¹. Do I think the helicopter had been sent out by the Orange Dictator, Donald J. Trump? Of course. Do I think it was looking specifically for me because of my importance to The Resistance? Yes, duh.

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No expense has been spared in their quest to keep me down

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¹Cheetos are orange. Let that fucking sink in.

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